So that was from last week

I have been thinking about a few things that seem to be key:

1. Students are not insecure or worried about self identity internally.
2. The insecurity becomes evident when questions are posited from the outside.

The pressure to conform to the greater societal norms is extensive. Here in the US people want individuals to fit into neatly defined boxes that they (John Q public) can then supposedly understand, yet we as people are becoming increasingly complex. We have multiple personas in daily life and in the virtual worlds.
We know we are not one-sided nor have we ever been, yet often research and general social expectations make it appear that we are that one dimensional. So when the idea of mutli-racial identity or rather when multi-racial individuals started demanding to be noticed, it set off all kinds of shock waves, both in the social arena and in the academic arena. But I digress, often in the literature regarding mixed identity there is a discussion of how people with mixed heritage are unstable and often depressed. The discussion is often focused on it being an issue with internal self knowing, rather than the struggle with external pressure to conform to the wider social expectations.
Who wouldn't feel depressed when asked "what are you?" and then in answer you say I am black and white, native and white...(just to name a two) and the questioner answers back "No, you're not." My first reaction is who the fuck are you to tell me what I am or am not. That doesn't even begin to address the insult of the question "What are you?" Many of the students I interviewed reported saying "Human" when asked that question. Personally, I like my son's answer, when I asked him what he said: "I'm white, honky; I'm black niggah."
Students are very clear and direct in their answers when asked "How do you identify yourself?" More often than not they reported varying their answers depending on context, but the most frequent choice was "I am biracial or mixed race." But we of course can't leave well enough alone, we push onward and insist that they pick one. Oh perhaps not the parents, but certainly the school that gets more federal funds for disadvantaged and minority students, or teachers who assume things based on dress, language use, body language or just based on skin color, or friends who say something negative about one of the cultural or ethnic groups the student belongs to. Now extend this to daily life, where you know who you are, but no one wants to believe you or people want to "correct" your perception of self. Despite this pressure to simplify students are solid in conception of self, but it would certainly explain some of the depression reported in young people, that is of course along with the normal depression experienced by teens.

Feeling down and whiny today

So I have finally gotten rid of a massive thorn in my side. But the effort I expended to help this person and then to get her out finally. So now the apartment is all fixed up, and I am happy to report that I can get back to being productive. I will be listening to my interviews over the next few weeks taking notes. I hope I wasn't too leading. I am feeling a big let down from the fucking work. I guess I work more under pressure, so I am going to try and set time lines and get things done. I don't know what to start with except listening and picking out things that seem important, then finding similarities, and differences. I have some ideas. Things like feeling out of place, being pushed around or excluded. What if anything can I get from the different family situations. Make a point of the middle of the roadness of the students, ie they are not the top students or the worst students.